Evil Milk, or Why It's Hard to be a Pregnant, Cheap Hippie

First, it's 11pm and I'm blogging, which is shocking in that I'm awake and actually writing. Turns out this last month of pregnancy comes with insomnia, something I have never, ever experienced. I'm exhausted around 1pm (and luckily find time to nap most days), but I'm wide awake until midnight. The kid is up at 6:30am regardless, so this is really not working out. But moving on...

I am currently drinking a glass of milk and having a near mental meltdown because of it. My husband bought the milk this week, and it's NOT ORGANIC. Cue: freak out. See, we started drinking soy milk soon after Sylvia was born. She was having so much trouble sleeping that I (briefly) tried giving up dairy (which I'd read can cause stomach upset through breast milk). She never slept better, but I liked the milk, so we stuck with it, which in the end proved a good idea as Sylvia was dairy-sensitive until about 20 months old. She likes soy milk too (she calls it "delicious milk" and won't drink the dairy kind), and my husband has a strong distrust of the Milk Industry (a.k.a. Evil Corporate Overlords with Strong Lobbying Power), so we've stuck with the soy.

All that said, I have strong hippie tendencies, and I like to do my Internet research, so I started learning about the possible negative effects of soy consumption during pregnancy (here is an example of a not very scientific overview of the concerns). More scientific reports (like this one from the Mayo Clinic) and others I read obsessively several months ago convinced me that drinking soy milk is OK, as long as I limit it to about one cup a day (soy has lots of benefits, too, so I felt good about that one cup).

That limit has become difficult to manage, as I have major dairy cravings. I use soy milk in my cereal (my usual breakfast) and my morning coffee or tea. That means I've had my one cup by 9am and a whole day of dairy cravings ahead of me. Thus, I've started buying dairy milk for that second serving of cereal at 9pm (don't judge), for the big glass in the middle of the day with graham crackers, and for mixing into the numerous baked goods I keep producing. Due to previously mentioned hippie tendencies and abundant research, I only ever buy organic milk, as I'd like to avoid Human Growth Hormones, especially (!) while pregnant.

So that brings us back to tonight's conundrum: I want milk, but Hubby has brought home evil, tarnished, regular, treated, dairy-industry over-produced milk. Yes, I drank this my whole life. Yes, most people the world over don't drink organic milk...but still. As I poured myself a glass (strong cravings tonight), I actually felt guilty. But I'm too cheap to throw it away, and my husband and daughter won't drink it...so here we are. I'm feeling about as guilty for this glass of milk as I would if I'd had the ice cream sundae I originally wanted (which, incidentally, is made from regular milk, as I'm too cheap to buy organic ice cream, so WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?!).

It's hard to care. And be cheap. And have cravings. And be pregnant. Man, I need a drink. At this point, I could likely be persuaded that wine is safer than the evil milk in my glass. Bottoms up!